i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
if only i could text you this smell
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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