Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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