am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize