lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
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