Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
