so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blood and glitter go together right?
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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