dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
