Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Randomize
