I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize