Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
