I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Randomize
