went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
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the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
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I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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