11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
