they need to just BURY HIM!
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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