So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
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