she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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