I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Randomize
