I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
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