Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
