you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize