i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
