I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize