He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Farmville is her only friend.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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