That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
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