how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
