Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Randomize