Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Let the clothes fall where they may.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize