you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
