just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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