if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
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