Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
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Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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