Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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