You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
