turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
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Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
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We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
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