i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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