jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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