I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
