Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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