I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
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