the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
