I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize