Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.