she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS