I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
