So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
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