Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
either way he was missing a nipple.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
