planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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