You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
