Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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