oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
