he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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